one time i accidentally asked for a large cock instead of a large coke at mcdonalds
“I fell in love the way you fall asleep; slowly, and then all at once” —John Green, The Fault in Our Stars (via parisheroinstars)
I am a mountain
You are the sky
I’ve got my head in the clouds
- This is what happened to me today on my way to practice...
- Me: Crap, I'm going to be late. *cutting through an alley*
- Shady Guy: *Leaning against the wall with three chocolate bars in hand*
- Hey! Would you like to buy some chocolate?
- Me: Oh sorry! I don't have any money on me.
- Guy: Whattt? Why not?
- Me: Um because I don't usually carry money with me when I go to practice. Sorry I can't help you out. *continues walking past*
- Guy: WAIT COME BACK
- Me: *turning around* Why???
- Guy: I wanna talk to you! Just hold on, come back.
- Guy: What's your name?
- Me: . . .Laurel.
- Guy: Oh, you mean like L'oreal? Ha ha ha.
- Me: No. Laurel.
- Guy: I see. *reaches out hand* I'm Tony.
- *still interlocked in an awkwardly firm handshake* *scans* Practice? Wh-what do you play?
- Me: I'm in cross-country,
- "Tony": Cross-country? What's that?
- Me: It's like long-distance running. *wiggles back hand*
- Tony: Oh. That's cool. What school do you go to?
- Me: ______.
- Tony: So you're from around here? Awesome. Where do you live?
- Me: . . .*pointing in totally off direction* Somewhere over there.
- Me: What are you selling those for?
- Tony: Oh it's for my um--church, in Arcadia.
- Me: Then what are you doing all the way over here?
- Tony: They make us go everywhere to sell these. So what else do you play?
- Me: Uh track & field but that's in the spring.
- Tony: Nice, nice. So you have like a six-pack?
- Me: Ha, I wish. I'm still working on it.
- Tony: Can I see?
- Me: what NO
- Tony: Come onnnn
- Me: No, I'm going to be late. Good luck selling your chocolate bars.
- Tony: NOOOO COME BACK
- Tony: *from a distance* U SUK